I'm baaaaaaack : )

So once again it has been quite a while since I have last posted anything, and considering everything that has gone on these past 6 months or so, I have good reason. For anyone following me that didn't know Alyssa passed away back in March, so these last 6 months have been a long and difficult journey for me to bring me to an understanding. For a while I was angry, I couldn't understand how a child who has battled cancer for a year, has been found cancer free, could die from complications caused by the treatments given to help cure it? I have made peace with her passing away considering that being angry wasn't going to change anything, and I'm glad she's in a better place. Ginger and I (Alyssa's mom) have decided we want to start a foundation in Alyssa's name and are working slowly on the finer details that goes with it. It seems to be a very detailed process, so who knows how long it could be. Anyway, we want to name it Angels of Hope, which we think would be fitting...because Alyssa had so much hope, and we want to be able to share that Hope with other families.
I decided to not to go back to school this semester...interesting things have happened with NGU, and I just feel like God is pointing me in a different direction. Don't know what that direction is just yet, but I'm gonna keep praying, and in time I will know.
In the meantime I have a full-time babysitting job for little 6 week old Lauren. I'll have to post pictures when I get time. She's absolutely beautiful and precious. Very exciting.

I've had a struggle recently with forgiveness, and something awesome happened. Sunday I went to church (at Marathon) and the sermon was on Why we feel like God hasn't answered our prayers. This message applied to me...big time. Eddie talked about how sometimes when we can't forgive others for whatever reason, we let that bitterness distract us from our relationship with him. If we can't get past that, then we aren't allowing God to work in our lives the way that we need him to. So I'm working on this. I have bitterness towards some people (friends, family, etc) that I have let distract me from what God's will may be for my life, and my purpose on this earth. So I'm letting go, and letting God take care of it. I am forgiving, and I am changing. I want my life to be more than what it is.

<3>

A little update...

Okay...so it's been a few many days since I've last blogged and let me just say...it's been so very busy. I started school at NGU and after a rough day of registration, I was finally able to get everything figured out and all my transferable credits transferred. I won't go into the details, but I swear if I have to go through that mess again, I'll just quit. Ha. Yeah, that bad. Other than that, things are going great.
After starting school, I began to realize how much I miss all my friends back home. I feel so lonely sometimes in this big ol' city of Greenville. It's tough.
So last week Mannie came down to visit, and we went to the Rascal Flatts concert here in Greenville. Ginger was given tickets and she actually came down too, so that was exciting because I hadn't seen her for what seemed like forever. The concert was AMAZING, but I'm kind of bias since they are my absolute favorite...haha.
This week in chapel we're having Student Led Renewal. It's been pretty awesome. A guy (I can't remember his name) spoke this morning about "being God's light". He spoke about how we are so fast to condemn, shutting out those people that do not know Him, and leaving them in the darkness...only to push them away from the only Light that can save them from their darkness. I thought, hmmm...well that's not me. I'm nice to everyone. Uhhhh it's not just being NICE to someone. He talked about how just gossiping about someone, being the first to judge, hating, even hating things like abortion (which I am against) and our new President, and many other things...The deal is, if we're hating, how can we be loving as God wants us to love others? How can we be witness when we are only arguing our views and getting mad because they can't see it our way? So he challenged everyone. Instead of "hating" on these people, or whatever your case may be, why not DO something? Why not pray for the president and those leading our nation? Why not be a Light in the darkness that other people have?
This is just something to think about...it sure made me think.
...in Him there is no darkness...

So it's been a while huh?

So Christmas and New Years have both come and gone. After being swept through the madness of this past holiday season, T and I are finally back at home...and enjoying just being in our own home together. This past week has been nice. We finally have Ellie's house outside and shingled. Now we've just got to paint it. So yeah, we're still slackin' around a little bit, but it's nice.
I start school at North Greenville next week. I'm pretty excited about that. I register on Monday for classes, and even though it's a small University compared to others it's still bigger than this small town girl is used to. I'm still trying to get into this "big city" stuff...and it's tough. I miss the small town. Anyways...(I am so ADD) I start class on Wednesday.
Pretty much everything has been about the same...just missing my family and friends a lot. It's just not the same.
OHHH for Christmas my wonderful husband got me tickets to see Rascal Flatts in concert on January 22nd. Jessica Simpson will be opening, so that's pretty exciting. I'm taking Mannie of course.
Alyssa is doing pretty well lately. She's had some procedures done (a tube put down her nose) because of a swallowing problem that she has encountered because of not eating and drinking, she has lost the strength in the muscles she uses to swallow, which has made taking her meds really difficult. But all in all, her radiation is almost over, and she's still holding on pretty strong and I'm very proud of her. After the radiation is over, and she gets the therapy to help with swallowing she may even be able to spend some time at home for a while...which will be good for the whole family.
Those are some others that I really miss right now. So Kaitlyn calls me on Christmas morning to tell me "you won't believe this...I woke up this morning and I hit the jackpot!" Haha. I love that kid. I'm just glad that despite everything this past year they had a good Christmas. I didn't get to see them because they were actually with someone else while I was up there, but I did get to see Alyssa and take all the Christmas gifts we bought for them up there to the hospital...so that was good at least. And then Daniel and Kaitlyn both called me on Christmas morning.
Sometimes a part of me feels so lost without them...
Maybe I need kids, huh? HAHAHA. Please...no one speak a word of that statement to Lindsey. She'll beat me.

Anyways....Hope everyone had a wonderful start to this New Year. I know that God has so many awesome things in store for 2009!